• Print

Payback... Farrier Style

Written by Cindy McConnell
Category: Humor
Hits: 5142

We'll call him Jack! The self-righteous man who taught the hands-on work at the farrier school I attended.

Now, Jack and I saw eye-to-eye on every horsey-related concept except the rules of relationships between male teachers and female students. Being the only women in class I needed to maintain strict policies in such matters. By this time Jack and I had already spent some 3 months throwing this issue back and forth.

I knew I was in for it when assigned to shoe 3 of the only available two year old geldings. One came complete with a young man named Bean to hang off his twisted ear, and another with a warning not to slap him on the rump, 'cause he'll double barrel you in the unmentionables!

Dripping with sweat, but the tasks complete, it was lunch time - thank you Lord for lunch breaks! I thought the sweat would drop another 5 pounds off my already dwindling frame.

Jack and I had a score to settle today. First job after grub was a re-set. Easy and quiet, just what I love. Having trouble steadying the shoe on the hoof and hammering in the first nail, Jack kindly knelt in front of me and placed thumbs on either side of the shoe. "THWAP!" Jack and I were almost even. Poor Jackie jumped and wheezed like a cat in a dog kennel. And I apologized for my truly misguided hammer blow.

Horse number two was another re-set and dead calm. Oh, happy day!

I worked casually while the owner explained the full range of her mount's talent. Upon completion I asked to try out some of these tricks. The horse did ride great. Bareback with binder twine around the base of his neck!

Suddenly I screamed and tears welled up in my eyes. The owner looked truly stunned, and knelt beside her beloved mount. "Jack!" I yelled, "HELP, HELP!" A startled Jack sprinted outside to see poor dobbin sprawled out in the dirt as stiff as could be. I cried that I was hammering and I hit blood, and the horse jumped and fell and hasn't moved a muscle since! The owner and I cried and hugged and made an awful fuss.

Jack was white as a ghost, spitting and sputtering about what should be done and how would he tell his boss. No longer able to hold it in, I laughed and laughed, almost wetting myself! Now Jack and I where even! Seems that trick horse could play dead very convincingly!